It's never going to be like before....

It's snow in Malmö. And it's not even december yet! :)
It's alot and I enjoy it so much.
This is the first time in 2 years I see snow.
Since I live down town in Malmö city, the snow normally never stays that long.
It just turns to water and dirt. And that I hate.

But now... It's been snowing so much and it's here to stay.
I totally love it. It's really cold but I for the first time, enjoy it!
The only thing that would have been great now is a dog or a child to play with!
The little child in me wants to come out when there is snow.

Lucky me I have Joel to play with from time to time then.
There is alot of child in both of us, even if we can be adults.
I still have to say that he is an amazing person!
And I'm still really glad to have him in my life, and I enjoy every time I spend with him.

Since I lost and left many people in my life lately, this is the best about it.
Nothing is never going to be like before. No matter what.
People change, people go different ways, and we grow apart.
It's just to realize it and move on.
But I am very glad I have a good memory because the good memories I will carry on for ever!
And the fun I had with some people will stay.
I do miss many people in my life, but there is nothing I can do about it.
It's just sad. But no matter what - my heart will always remember!
And maybe in a next life we'll have more time together! :)

For the last couple of weeks it felt like I have a cat in my appartment.
I know I don't have a cat any longer, but I sometimes see a cat in the corner of my eyes.
And sometimes I get afraid that I almost gonna step on my cat...
(When there is pants or shoes on the floor for exemple)
It feels like it's my old cat Misha.
I decided to talk to Leif and hear if she is dead and he was 95 % sure that she was.

So maybe my baby have found her way home again to me?
Strangest thing is that I don't feel lonely in my appartment anymore!
I miss my baby.

I also talked about some Thailand memories yesterday.
In that moment, those moments I moved on,
it felt like someone took my heart out of my body and throwed it on the floor and stepped on it.
But then someone else took it up and putted it back in! ME!

Can I be able to go back there one day and finish my mission?
Story ain't over yet.

But if I go...
I'll go for Yoga teaching or volountair work or something like that!
There is no party on my map anymore.


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