Empty
Today I had a great friday night. I wanted to have christmas joy.
While we made gingerbreads, saffron buns,
and were drinking mulled wine (alcohol free).....
Everything I could think of was this "situation" and whats have been said earlier that day.
I don't know what to think about human beings anymore.
Nothing surprises me any longer but there is just no end to this.
WHERE DO YOU CROSS THE LINE?
But the most important question - DO YOU KNOW when you cross it??
Do you know what you are draging other people into?
Do you know what you do to other people and make them suffer?
I DON'T THINK SO!
I shut of all my feelings. Isn't it what people want me to do?
Be totally careless and feel nothing? Talk to a wall. An empty shell.
Like I've been for years. Going back to the same old Lee as once before?
I tried to smile and be happy the whole night, but it just didn't work.
I sailed away with my mind to somewhere else, where I could be free.
Where I could be peaceful and lonely and dream of chocolate hills and fluffy bunnys.
My friends asked me all the time: Are you tired?
No.. Just quiet...
I think I picked the wrong day to have christmas joy.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To something else...
We went to Siciliana and had pizza.
Across the table, 3 men were sitting and drinking beer.
One of them had the same face as "him".
Same eyes, same lips and it was just same same but different.
The only thing I wanted to do was to walk over there and touch his face.
We got eye contact couple of times.
I noticed that I was staring a little bit too much.
And he noticed it as well, but he smiled back at me.
Even if I moved on it was a bit hard for me. It still hurts.
I still miss him. I still wish he was close.(r).
The only thing I want to do now is to get drunk...
Drunk as f*ck. Lucky me that I have school tomorrow.
Otherwise I would be totally smashed at the moment.
No, I don't think I would, but I really wanted to.
Almost 4 months now :D
Well.... It's time for bed.
While we made gingerbreads, saffron buns,
and were drinking mulled wine (alcohol free).....
Everything I could think of was this "situation" and whats have been said earlier that day.
I don't know what to think about human beings anymore.
Nothing surprises me any longer but there is just no end to this.
WHERE DO YOU CROSS THE LINE?
But the most important question - DO YOU KNOW when you cross it??
Do you know what you are draging other people into?
Do you know what you do to other people and make them suffer?
I DON'T THINK SO!
I shut of all my feelings. Isn't it what people want me to do?
Be totally careless and feel nothing? Talk to a wall. An empty shell.
Like I've been for years. Going back to the same old Lee as once before?
I tried to smile and be happy the whole night, but it just didn't work.
I sailed away with my mind to somewhere else, where I could be free.
Where I could be peaceful and lonely and dream of chocolate hills and fluffy bunnys.
My friends asked me all the time: Are you tired?
No.. Just quiet...
I think I picked the wrong day to have christmas joy.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To something else...
We went to Siciliana and had pizza.
Across the table, 3 men were sitting and drinking beer.
One of them had the same face as "him".
Same eyes, same lips and it was just same same but different.
The only thing I wanted to do was to walk over there and touch his face.
We got eye contact couple of times.
I noticed that I was staring a little bit too much.
And he noticed it as well, but he smiled back at me.
Even if I moved on it was a bit hard for me. It still hurts.
I still miss him. I still wish he was close.(r).
The only thing I want to do now is to get drunk...
Drunk as f*ck. Lucky me that I have school tomorrow.
Otherwise I would be totally smashed at the moment.
No, I don't think I would, but I really wanted to.
Almost 4 months now :D
Well.... It's time for bed.
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