ૐ It's just me ☼ Lee Lee ૐ ☮ ♥

A guy told me that once. And since that day it has been stuck on my mind.

And after that I heard almost the same words from another close friend.

Something that is so powerful and strong, have to be controled.

It can be really hard sometimes but that's life. It can't always be easy.

Then you have to try harder and remember your mistakes.

 

Sometimes you wonder if things you do is right or wrong.

It takes time to figure it out sometimes, but sometimes you just know.

I know I have a strong and powerful mind and I

many times know how to control it, or think smart.

Or as I like to say : Different.

 

Sometimes I wonder if I let myself get in to weird situations

because I like it or it gives me a kick,

or if I just want to check if I can do something about the situation.

Changing things, helping people and then move on to another objects of helping.

I don't know if it's in the family but it seems like

we like to help other people before helping ourselves.

 

All of my closest friends and me got something in common.

And I can actually say almost EVERYONE.

(I can count at least 10 on my fingers.)

 

PROBLEMS.

 

Mostly missing FATHER FIGURES. Or family problems.

How come? Is it just a coinsedense or am I drawn to people

that remind me of myself or those who have problems just like myself?

But who doesn't have problems?

I don't like an easy living that's for sure.

 

I've been thinking alot of these kind of situations and I can't figure it out.

Do I want a normal life, ever? NO! (?)

But, WHAT is a normal life?

A ”normal life” is so different for everybody on this planet.

A relationship should not be perfect.

A life should not be perfect either.

If it's perfect, it's not fun anymore.

There should be drama, but you have to draw the line where.

You should feel comfertable together, have a good connection,

should grow together, love, trust and belive each other.

It should be like a best friend. But better.

 

Today I feel weird because yesterday I had too many things on my mind.

I can't put my finger on how I feel really.

My head was just spinning and working harder then ever.

I had 2 days off working but yet I can't relax and feel comfertable.

One second I feel good and happy and the next unfomfertable and unhappy.

Why is this? My life is super great, but I still feel like something is missing.

 

I guess I need to think more maybe. Or maybe less?

I really would love to have more ”alone time” right now, but it's impossible.

I'm gonna go out jogging now and see if it's helping.

It helped me alot before so I'm gonna try.

 

I'll be back later on. Ciao.